Best Friend.

Daddy, i know we talk a lot during the day but lately, i can't get enough of you. I need your help. I have a best friend. Her name is Kayla and i love her so dearly. We are in a tough spot right now and i know we are growing through this and if this is where you want us i submit myself to you, no questions asked. But if it is in your will Daddy could you please lay on our hearts what your will is about this so that we mutually agree. Whether it be her you have chosen for him or me or maybe neither. Please just whatever the answer be make is so completely, undeniably obvious to both of us so that we both know what your will is concerning this. Help us to both seek you whole heartedly in this and every part of our lives and unselfishly submit ourselves to you, trusting you even without answers. I love her dearl dad, Please help us to know your desires so that we can obey. I love you daddy. Thank you for transforming me.

Little Me.

*sigh* daddy where do i begin? I guess i could just think everything i am trying to put into words and you could read my thoughts but i really need to put this in writing. it's Jenny God. I have never met a girl who frustrates/exasperates/worries me as much as this girl and never have i loved another in the youth group like her either. I simply adore her. The potential she has makes me want to pull my hair out and knowing her possibilities if she ever truly gets who You are keeps me up at night marveling at what she could be one day. She has more influence and charisma and talent and beauty than is really fair for one small girl. But she has no one to believe in her. And so she tosses it to the side, throws it in some dark corner of her closet because really no one thinks she is good enough anyway right? That is what she hears from the people who are supposed to be her biggest fans. But i believe in her daddy. And i know you do. So, what can i do for her? I try to love on her. I try to give her special attention. I try to make myself available. I try to encourage her. But is it going to be enough. Because at the end of the day is it going to be my words ringing in her ears or the voices of jealousy and disbelief and indifference? I don't know. I wish i could see a year from now and see who she will be when she graduates. Will anything i did have made any difference or will the cool kids and family and guys have left the biggest mark on her? Please God change her heart radically becauses really i am helpless. I can love her and pray for her but any real change will ultimately have to come from You. I am begging you on her behalf. Change her heart in a huge way. Please God, i love her so much.

P.S.

Hey dad,
I need you.
Love, Me

Control Freak.

*sigh* God, this is the thing i struggle with the most. I never thought it was a problem before, but then You started getting all in my personal space and i began to notice a whole lot more. I have been doing a lot better letting go of things and leaving them min Your hands where they belong, but some days it is still hard. It is little things that i just want to grab onto and not let go of. But i know You are all good and You have already planned my life step by step. And i know this time i am in now is not only important, but crucial. I have been learning do much and growing so much. And Jordan has too. It has been so amazing being able to see the growth in him. I know You are busy working in his life as well as mine. I feel a little down lately though so I am going to need you even more. Thank you for this time even though i am confused and unsure. I hope in You. You are my only hope, my only source of strength, my everything.