Now What.

I feel so torn most of the time lately God. Part of me wants to leave and try again somewhere else. But the other part of me doesn't feel completely okay with that. And of course my heart pitches a fit at the thought of leaving behind Jordan. What do you want me to do? I know that him and I need to learn again how to be friends. We once were the best of friends. Before we became more and even after we were dating he remained my best friend. But somewhere in the last few months that changed. I still want him to be my best friend, but i need a lot of help with that. There are a lot of hurt feelings and pride in the way. It hurts to look at him and i know apart from you even a chance at us being best friends again is impossible. I still don't understand all of this Lord, but this i know: You are worthy of praise through the good and through this. Even pain is a reason to turn around and praise you and so since i have no idea of what else to do, i will worship in the meantime. And wait.